Month 17.5 – HUGE FLARE :(

Well, it was good as it lasted! What seems to be the break is over. It was insane how fast my skin got bad when it seemed like it took forever to heal. Within two days of posting the 17month update post, skin started to go down hill and hasn’t stopped. Yesterday I took a sulfur bath and right now I feel less inflamed and more dry. Perhaps it is helping. I don’t actually know.

I have a feeling I am allergic to cats and I was around one for about a week which did not help with my skin. I think. I don’t actually know. Its extremely frustrating why I flared again when I was doing so well, but all one can do is hope it will go away! It’s disappointing as I was excited to be with my husband when I was all healthy, but alas.

My skin is terrible. It is a full body flare, I am covered in hives all over my body. Arms, neck, scalp, and face are the worst but my torso, back, legs, and butt are bad as well. In addition, I have tiny blisters on my feet and hands which were never affected throughout the entire topical steroid withdrawal, so I am a bit worried. Skin that is not covered with hives are strong and moisturized, although unfortunately there aren’t too many of those. My neck, scalp, and behind my ears were oozing a bit, it seemed to have subsided now, but who knows. For now I will continue on with the sulfur baths and hope it helps.

Thankfully itch isn’t too bad. I definitely am a lot more itchier, but I can sleep through the night and itch is not all consuming. That is another confusing thing for me actually -I am not even itching that much but the skin seems to continue to get worse. Mind boggling this topical steroid withdrawal! 
Mentally I was pretty depressed for about a week and a half as I saw my skin go downhill. It was devastating to realize I had to suffer again and I was not, in fact, done with this shitty process. That said, I definitely have more energy now than I did during second and third flares… Which is weird because I think my skin is far far worse. Confusing. I am trying really hard to stay positive and happy. My husband is as supportive and loving and generally awesome as usual and for him I am trying really hard to remind myself of the blessings in my life and it is mostly working! It’s hard work to remain upbeat- don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Chronic illness is a bitch and if it affects how you look, it’s a double bitch! But we still have control over how we feel and I am choosing to feel blessed and happy.

Pictures will come at 18 month update next week. Hope everyone is having a better skin day than I am!

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